Ring of Jobber

The Ring of Honor federation continues to offer fantastic pro wrestling performed by gorgeous studs.  Speaking of studs, check out Tommaso Ciampa — the smooth Italian beefcake with the cocky mohawk wearing too tight little speedos.

Tomasso has been on the Indy scene for years now, and I was never sure how I felt about him.  Seeing him on ROH violently beat down his opponents while strutting around in those bulging briefs, WHEW! I am sure I’m into this hunk, who now calls himself the “Dominant Male.”

Those of us who grew up on pro wrestling in the 1980’s were treated to weekly displays of male frailty and submission which were known as “Jobber Squashes.”  Many of us really miss that style of match — the unbridled suffering, the willingness of the weaker man to demonstrate his utter inferiority.  Nowadays most wrestlers are unwilling to play the role of pussy — their egos and their precious self-esteem get in the way I guess.

Along comes this handsome, smiley pup known as Shiloh Jonze.  And my beloved ROH bookers force him to play the Jobber role.  YES!   Like all good jobbers, he is just cocky and mis-behaved enough (with his unkempt hair, his strings hanging out of his raggedy trunks, the asinine spelling of his name) to warrant and deserve a stiff beating.  I can’t wait!  (Is Shiloh a damn ginger to boot?)

When ensues is a stunning and perfect Jobber Squash worthy of a weekly pro wrestling show from the 80’s.  We soon love to hate cocky Ciampa as we watch him strut around with his bikini briefs riding up his muscular ass, systematically kicking our boy Shiloh’s ass without mercy.

And if Shiloh’s job is to appear defeated and humiliated, well he deserves a bonus for his good work.  He degrades himself repeatedly, kneeling before the Dominant Male, allowing Ciampa to pull his face into that bulging crotch and generally treat him like a ragdoll.

Leave it to Ring of Honor — which delivers the very best pro wrestling in the world — to give us an Old School Jobber Squash!  Will we now see more and more 80’s style one-sided beat-downs?  If any ROH bookers are reading this, just know that every single match doesn’t need to be this brutal and one-sided — but once-in-a-while, a good ole Jobber Squash sure gives this wrestling fan a charge!

One of Tommaso’s most favorite attacks — and part of the reason I dig him — is a devastating running Knee to the waiting face of his jobber.  The poor victim’s skull is conveniently propped against the turnbuckle, just waiting for Tommaso to slam a knee to the kisser. Then BANG! — we see a close-up of that big hard knee slamming in like a missile (or a big pecker.)

It’s the repetition of this move that makes it resemble a rough, hard pounding.  I also dig the way Tommaso sadistically holds his knee against the man’s cheek each time, pausing the scene so we can enjoy it and savor it.  He leans on the ropes and flirts with the crowd, taking his time like a classic Heel, his knee still pressed on the victim’s face.  Slow, patient sadism always does it for me!

So if you enjoy great ring psychology — pro wrestling in the Old School style but with a sexy modern twist — be sure to watch Ring of Honor.  Also if you like to look at fit, handsome guys in skimpy gear that highlights their great bodies, be sure to watch Ring of Honor.

If you like it when a muscle-man clamps his legs around a jobber’s neck, then hoists the pretty-boy crotch-to-face onto his shoulders, only to destroy him with a deadly Power-Bomb, be sure to watch Ring of Honor.  To finish him off, Tommaso delivers a degrading final pinning position, using poor Shiloh’s face as a kneeler…

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5 Responses to Ring of Jobber

  1. Stay Puft says:

    Thank you, Ring of Honor! Alex Silva also had a good showing against Ciampa (although in jobber terms, “a good showing” means “a completely one-sided beatdown”!).

  2. JJ Laroux says:

    i MISS those old school squashes! not to mention tights like ciampa wears! nice find!

  3. Marc Pedn says:

    I haven’t watched Pro on T.V. in Quite a few years, being WWE was showcasing noting but Roided Out guys who wanted nothing but to show their body’s ie: standing on the corner ropes and flexing. Don’t get me wrong, Incredible Body’s on Incredibly Goodlooking men, Who Wouldn’t want to see men like that. My issue is, Im a Die Hard WRESTLING FREEK, I want to watch and see Men, no matter the Body type, Pounding on, Punishing, Dominating and Working over other men, ie: DoughBoys ( thanks arsenal ) Beefy built guy’s, hairy chested Hunks, and the best..Cockie Jobberboys. Something WWE forgot. ( Vince! ) Now that ROH has appeared, I can’t get enough ! Jobbers like Shiloh, man can this kid sell Punishments, Heels like Tommaso, Arrogant-cockie goodlooking, a NATURAL Build. I can ONLY hope, ROH kicks cockie WWE’s butt and Pin’s em to the mat in the Ratings. If you haven’t watched ROH guy’s…Watch it……More of the OLD SCHOOL mentality than WWE, hands down.

  4. Dreamboy says:

    You’re an amazing writer Wrestling Arsenal!!! You really know how to focus on the homo-erotic nature of pro wrestling! It’s at first off-putting yet campy lol

  5. Allen says:

    ROH matches always look great when I see them on Wrestling Arsenal. I would love to know how else to watch ROH matches. As far as I know, I receive only WWE and Impact wrestling in sw Florida. Is there a way to see ROH matches on the internet? How does one see them? WWE and Impact have become so boring that I am usually on the internet with Wrestling Arsenal instead of watching them. When I was younger I was an enthusiastic wrestler, amateur, with whomever took me on. I know good from bad, phony from real. WWE and Impact are just not cutting it for me any more. Too much talk, too much pro fantasy which is too obvious and the matches are just no longer convincing. So any leads as
    to how to receive ROH and other independent wrestling programs would be appreciated.