Filthy Gorgeous

David Starr — whom I always mean to blog about more often — has been working in England lately for International Pro Wrestling (IPW).  He’s gotten into a feud with one of the hottest guys in their federation named Rob Sharpe.

Sharpe is an interesting character — conventionally handsome and hyper-masculine, but his bulging pink trunks and dyed pink top-knot of hair hint at a flamboyant and kinky side.  The sexiest pro wrestlers tend to bend gender roles, implying that they may be a little  ambiguous behind closed doors, which fuels the male audience’s  sexual fantasies and sells more tickets.


Before their match begins, we see a recap of an earlier bout from three weeks prior that started their feud, which is available on YouTube.  It was an intense fight — both studs come off looking spectacular and tough — maybe I will blog about it some day.

I mention the prior match here just to give you some context on how strongly these enemies despise (and are obsessed with) each other.   As with most pro wrestling feuds, there is more than a little homo-erotic sub-text in the way they both want to dominate and ravage the other, saving their most punishing assaults for when they’re in the ring together.


Speaking of dominating and ravaging, check out Starr’s pin attempt on an exhausted Rob Sharpe.  Those snug pink trunks can barely handle the strain,

I think the ref noticed cheater Starr’s foot on the rope because this was not a pinfall.



In the past, Sharpe has portrayed the arrogant Better-Than-You-Lot villain.  I’ve seen videos of him in Tag Team action, fighting dirty.  However, in this feud against American David Starr — who cheats often these days — Sharpe is portraying the Hometown Hero.

I suspect the name Rob Sharpe is meant to evoke the tragic young hero from the Game of Thrones franchise: Robb Stark.


The week after his painful Pile-Driver defeat, David Starr attacked Sharpe with a steel chair.  Then Sharpe retaliated the following week by causing Starr to lose a match.  It’s been the usual back-and-forth grab ass between two pro wrestlers in a feud.

So on the March 8th episode of IPW, available on YouTube, the enemies got in the ring again to maybe settle the score (or to add even more heat to their red hot rivalry.)  Starr wore black trunks for the occasion to let us know that he’s not playing around any more and that he is definitely the Heel here.



Ding! Ding!!   The match begins with Sharpe showing his countrymen that he is the stronger opponent in this bout.  Starr suffers and plots his diabolical revenge.

Sharpe demonstrates manly strength and potency early in the match (in spite of his effeminate pink gear), just man-handling the smaller man and looming over him like a boss.

Keep an eye on that pink belt Sharpe is wearing (which I dig) because later, it will prove to be his undoing.

 


Starr uses the ropes to his advantage, as Heel Bastards do, by snapping the middle rope up into Sharpe’s throat.  What a fun and naughty little bullshit move!

This dirty move is used to explain how Starr is able to over-power and gain control of the larger (but perhaps more gullible) stud — by crushing his windpipe.


The crooked cheater follows up with some eye-gouging — always a sadistic pleasure.

What a typical greedy, arrogant American this David Starr is — willing to break the rules and exploit vulnerable people to get ahead.  Are all the Yanks like this, not just their politicians??



Look what Starr does here — a fun Dickhead Heel scene.  He pretends to shoot a bazooka at his victim, then flings his whole body, elbow first, into Sharpe’s ribcage.

Then he slips out of the ring and blows us a fucking kiss.  Oh yes, you hairy-chested show-off.  Keep doing that dirty bullshit and gloating the entire time.


They act out a bullying scene where Sharpe is struggling to get to his feet, and Starr keeps peppering him with these bitchy, annoying kicks and slaps.   He “pie-faces” his big, hunky enemy, basically pushing him back down with a Three Stooges facial shove.

This had to trigger the British fans, seeing their Hometown Boy totally degraded and mastered by a cheeky Yankee bloke.  Even I began to dislike Starr by about two percent when I saw him torture Rob Stark, I mean Rob Sharpe.


Finally Sharpe can’t take this degradation any longer and he goes Ape Shit, just grounding and pounding David Starr.

I’m sure the audience is loving this sweet revenge, but it feels too violent and brutal to me.  Don’t you dare harm my poor David, you big pink-haired brute!  After all, I’m not done obsessing over him yet.


This heated stare-down highlights Sharpe’s superior size and power now that he is fully erect.  He lets us know that in spite of his pink hair and pink panties, he is 100% a powerful man who must be respected.

We also see how vulnerable and helpless David Starr is, confronted by the bear he’s been poking all night.


As Sharpe approaches Starr in the corner, the Yank shows what he thinks of the Brit, spewing a big gob of spittle on his chest.

It appears Starr gave him a pearl necklace as the discharge streams down his left pectoral to drip onto his six-pack abs.  Now which man is truly the “Filthy Gorgeous” one?

 


Surely they can’t end the feud like this, with the foreigner (and smaller man) defeating the big British stud on his home turf.  In front of all his fans.  After spitting right on him like he is nothing.

Surely they will wrestle again (and again and again) until Sharpe is eventually able to redeem his manhood and vanquish this filthy, gorgeous bastard!   Surely Rob Sharpe will have a happier ending than Robb Stark did?  I can’t wait to find out…

 

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