The Dirty Reds, Part 2 of 2

03axelcaughtThis article continues my recap of the recent UCW Tag Team video where the dirty Red Team seems to be getting away with (attempted) murder.

After torturing Austin for a while, the Red Team allows Axel to tag in.  Here we get a glimpse of the referee, watching passively as Chase illegally Sleepers poor Axel from outside the ropes so Miles can drill him in the belly.  CHEATERS!

05slugUCW is presenting the old Biased Referee gimmick, with the (paid off?) official turning a blind eye whenever the Red Team breaks the rules, but quickly enforcing fair play if the Blue Team even hesitates to trade places in the ring.   This is the stuff my wrestling fantasies are made of!

This is great ring psychology — the presentation of unfair odds for the hapless Good Guys who suffer all sorts of degrading torture but are prevented from fighting fire with fire.  As Axel suffers, Austin expresses his outrage from the corner: “Turn around Ref!  Can’t you see they’re KILLING my partner behind your back?!?” — loaded phrases which get me even more turned on when I hear the angry partner bitching and moaning.

03ImHavingFun05slowcouuntThe ref’s unfair bias is made apparent when Axel tries to pin Miles.  And the ref.  Counts.  Really.  Really.  Slowly.

Miles kicks out, and we’re left thinking: “Fuck, our poor boys in blue can never win if this dirty ref refuses to count out the Red Team!”  That sense of injustice is what makes pro wrestling a turn-on.


I fucked up the caption in the above photo — referring to “Austin” as the suffering Blue Team member when it’s actually Axel cringing in pain for us.  I must have Austin stuck in my brain from his great Face-in-Peril performance in my previous article.  Oh well, I’m not fixing that caption — what is Axel gonna do about it, beat me up?


UCW bouts are always fairly violent and rough, making it look and feel as if they’re REALLY hurting each other, and this beat-down is no exception.

Here the Dirty Reds stomp Axel into the mat as the ref jerks off with Austin in the far corner.  How do the UCW guys endure this brutality and constant ball busting  without going to the hospital after every match??   UCW fights look and feel more painful and realistic than the mainstream Big Show federations where the performers earn like 10,000 times what these poor guys are probably making.   Yet they bust their asses for us anyway.

06nipplayI haven’t written enough about Chase because I’ve been distracted by all the other hot aspects of this match.  Chase has a gruff working-man vibe that jives with his Heel persona.  He seems like a tough fucker with his buzz cut and sexy goatee and I’m feeling it.

I think he may be rougher on the Blue Team than his partner, and that’s saying a LOT.

09chokeropeThis final animation really sums up the whole match nicely.  Axel finally gains the upper hand with a Boston Crab, and Chase wraps a FUCKING ROPE around his neck to choke him out. Fuck yes, UCW!

The ref must be over in the blue corner, making sure Austin can’t come to the rescue as Axel gets strangled.

They guys in UCW always say they want to give us fans the sort of matches we enjoy, and in this case, they really ticked off my boxes:  Tag Team action in a ring, dirty cheating, trash talk, rough abuse, biased officiating, a FOREIGN FUCKING OBJECT!, matching team uniforms, skimpy gear, attractive physiques, my heroes suffering, and me a satisfied customer.  (A few times over.)




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One Response to The Dirty Reds, Part 2 of 2

  1. Dr.Fever says:

    Now these are the sort of trunks all wrestlers should grapple in!