Smear the Queer

When I was 10 or 12, we played a game called “Smear the Queer” on the playground.  The rules were simple: one brave player (the “queer”) would pick up the ball and run, and all the other boys would chase him down to tackle and pile on him.  He would then hand over the ball to another player, who then would be chased and tackled, and so on.

I’m not sure who invented and named this odd game, but it seemed to be designed to send specific messages about manhood and the herd mentality to the young players.  It occurs to me that, similar to pro wrestling, this game was crafted to indoctrinate boys about the patriarchy, the male pecking order, and the advantages of having male friends.

Let’s examine some of the common themes shared by pro wrestling and Smear the Queer that promote homosocial bonding (mixed with plenty of homophobia), the supremacy of manhood, and the dominance of men as the privileged class.

1. The Danger of Standing Out

In Smear the Queer, the guy holding the ball is the “Queer” or the outcast.  We see that it is acceptable to smear him and crush him.  The obvious message is that “queers” deserve to be punished.  I wonder how many future gay bashers were first inspired by this violent game.

In pro wrestling, the Baby-face is the “Queer.”  He stands out from the herd because of his bright, colorful clothing, his bare skin, and his handsome good looks.

The flamboyant male  is always made to suffer in the wrestling ring, and we learn to be OK with that.  He is battered and busted and as we watch in satisfaction.

In pro wrestling, we don’t join in the destruction directly, but we don’t try to stop it either.  We sanction and approve of the smearing by tuning in or purchasing tickets and cheering when the queer gets smeared.

2.  The Herd Advantage

In Smear the Queer, the group always wins in the end.  Sooner or later, the wayward queer is captured, tackled, and piled on to smash him until he surrenders the ball.  The Boys Club always rules.

Pro wrestling also shows us the power of groups.  In Tag Team matches, a lone “queer” is invariably  isolated and out-numbered.  Many wrestlers find success in a “stable” of other tough guys who dominate the federation.  So we learn to stick with the crowd, follow the leader, play it safe — a herd mentality.

3. Take It Like a Man

If the ball is tossed to you while playing Smear the Queer, the worst thing you can do is drop it like a coward and refuse to accept the wrath of the pursuing mob.

Refusing to play the queer for the pleasure of the herd results in an even worse punishment than a rough tackling: banishment from the male privileged class.  Drop the ball and you’ll be uninvited, forced to play jump-rope with the girls the rest of the semester.

In pro wrestling, everyone knows the baby-face will suffer a stiff beating in the ring — probably including the baby-face himself.  Yet he bravely enters the ring anyway with confidence and bravado — a ballsy masculine performance.  As his torture increases, he demonstrates his intestinal fortitude — his manliness — by enduring the pain.  He is praised for it.

This teaches young men about the importance of the masculine performance, the need to prove oneself as a Real Man in the eyes of other men.  Physical pain and punishment are to be endured without tears.  But the failure to walk, talk, run, jump, spit, fuck, and fight like a man will be severely punished.

4. Male Bonding is Allowed (to a point)

When the mob catches and smears the queer, a dog-pile usually occurs.  The tacklers lay on their victim chest-to-chest, and the other players jump on their backs to utterly smother the “queer” on the bottom.

The irony is that the players are meant to be smearing a “queer” — acting out a gay bashing to symbolically avert his potential homosexual advances — yet they engage in physical contact with all the other males in the process.  Their limbs are entangled, their bodies stacked in a sweaty twisted heap.  Each player is eager to become intimate with the others, so he willingly jumps onto the pile (but can still deny any latent homosexual feelings because it’s all just part of the game.)

Pro wrestling is filled with scenes of males into bonding.  They apply “holds,” they hug their partners, they pin one another down, they touch each other a lot.

We are taught from these scenarios that male-on-male physical contact is OK and socially acceptable depending on the right context.  We’re taught that it’s always fine (not gay) to touch another male’s body, as long as you either fighting, wrestling, celebrating, consoling, encouraging, protecting, or are really really wasted.

However, you may not flirt sexually — that could result in Gay Panic and a swift and painful punishment in return.  If males are going to rule the world, then anything not-male needs to be destroyed.